Foolish
by I'llBelieveYouWhen
Summary: Kate leaves, and Castle can't handle it.  WARNING: Character Death


**AN: Hey guys! So this is my first published fanfic, and I really hope you enjoy it!**

**WARNING: Character death**

**DISCLAIMER: I'm 15. And I live in New Jersey. Do you really think I would be here right now if I owned this wonderfully amazing show?**

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><p><strong>Foolish<strong>

_Kody sat down on the avenue._

_He tapped his feet to the humming of the highway._

_He watched the light shine down on the broken glass, and thought,_

_I don't got no reasons, yet._

_And there it is and there it was._

_It was clear to all of us._

_We kept his hat of broken dreams,_

_And we pulled them out when we needed them the most._

Gone. All of it. Gone. His charm, his wit, his bright blue eyes, his ruggedly handsome looks… They are all just memories now. Late last night, Rick Castle foolishly took his own life.

He and Kate were fighting for quite some time, and the last one was by far the worst. She packed her bags, and threw her wedding ring at his face on the way out the door. She called the lawyer the next morning. Kate Castle was finished being Kate Castle. _"It was a mistake anyway,"_ she thought to herself.

He called her many times over the days following their fight. He sounded off the few times she actually answered, but she just pushed that off to her leaving. When she did answer, she would scream at him. She told him to leave her alone, and to expect a call from her lawyer.

The calls stopped about a week later. _"Finally,"_ she thought, _"he got the message."_ The next morning, however, she learned her message came in too clearly.

_So please hand me the bottle,_

_I think I'm lonely now._

_And please give me direction._

_I think the hurt set in,_

_And I don't feel nothing._

When the officer told her about her husband's death, she went numb. She couldn't feel a bone in her body. The world around her just stopped. He shot himself in his office, and to make matters worse, he used the gun she gave him. One word came to mind. _Monster_. She was a monster. She left him, and now he's dead. She did this to him. Kate Castle killed her husband.

The officer handed her the suicide note after she asked for it. She knew he wrote one; he was a writer for God's sake! She sat on the couch and read it. It said that she is not to be blamed. She was right to leave him, and he should have tried harder. Then he said his life wasn't worth living if he couldn't be with her. He apologized for all of his mistakes, and he apologized for his death.

Anger swept over her. He had no right to leave this world the way he did! Too many people still needed him! His daughter needed him, his mother needed him, his friends needed him, his fans needed him! She needed him. More than ever did she need him. She went over to the refrigerator that held the liquor and grabbed a bottle of wine. Settling back on the couch, she watched the chaos around her as she slowly sipped the wine.

_There's a squeak hinge down on the back gate._

_It lets us know if he comes around._

_I don't sleep that good anyway._

_If you've never heard the silence, it's a God awful sound._

Kate slept at the loft that night wearing one of his many blue shirts. On his side of the bed, she clung to a body pillow that smelled strongly of him. Usually, she went to bed before him and waited for the creaking of their bedroom door to tell her he's finally come to bed. That night, there was only silence. It was possibly the worst sound she'd ever heard in her life. Kat finally let the weight of the day crash down on her like a tsunami. She sobbed for what seemed like hours.

_I don't much get down to the avenue._

_I could try, but it takes so much to get there._

_Don't get off on all the broken glass, the Cadillac scene,_

_Well,_

_I've seen a lot of good things die,_

_And I'm in an overemotional way._

She and Alexis sold the loft, and because it was New York City, it sold within two weeks. They decided that all of the good memories made in that house just couldn't outweigh the one bad memory that will always haunt their dreams.

Alexis was very strong. She saved Kate from herself. Without her, she would have drowned in her own mind, going over the "what ifs." Kate finally forgave herself, too.

She was given back her wedding ring. It was found in Rick's hand. She wears it all the time now, vowing never to take it off again.

As she gets ready for his memorial service, she looks at the ring. She sun's rays catch it perfectly, making it sparkle and gleam just as it did on the day he proposed to her. She remembers that day like it was yesterday. He took her to a little park she used to visit with her mother when she was only seven or eight. She starts breaking down. Through her sobs, she feels two pairs of hands on her. Alexis and Martha are there whispering words of support and comfort, all the while, fighting back their own tears.

With that, they head downstairs to the lobby of Kate's new building and await their car.

_"Things will get better," _Kate thought, _"but only because they have to."_

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><p><strong>Okay, so I really hope you liked it, and reviews would be greatly appreciated :)<strong>


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